I am a mom who has accompanied a very special daughter for 19 years. My daughter was diagnosed with autism when she was little less than 3 years old. For my family and me who were unfamiliar with even the term autistic, this incident has completely shaken us.
My life as a battle has started from that time. I went to work in the morning, no sooner I arrived home after work in the afternoon then my child and I went to the speech clinic, followed by ABA class, and completed her homework from OT clinic late until after 9 pm. This repetitive lifestyle built around her therapy continued for a few years, but my daughter didn’t seem to be getting any better, my family and I started showing symptoms of stress.
When was the last time our family smiled at looking at one another’s face? We blamed, even hated one another. We hurt one another as if we were stabbing thorns. Therefore, the seemingly unending and excruciating battle between my husband and our old daughter vs. my special younger daughter went on, but the outcome was always the time of emptiness, confusion, anxiety, and fear. These painful battles have taken several years and then starting one day…a tidal wave of thoughts buried me alive to give it all up and vanish.